Well, everybody’s got a story to tell. And everybody’s got a wound to be healed. I want to believe there’s beauty here ‘cause oh I get so tired of holding on. I can’t let go, I can’t move on. I want to believe there’s meaning here. How many times have you heard me cry out “God please take this”? How many times have you given me strength to just keep breathing? Oh, I need you. God, I need you now. Standing on the road I didn’t plan. Wondering how I got where I am. I’m trying to hear that still small voice. I’m trying to hear above the noise. How many times have you heard me cry out “God please take this”? How many times have you given me strength to just keep breathing? Oh, I need you. God, I need you now. -Plumb “I Need you Now”
This song has been ringing true to me for such a long time now. I have a story that needs to be told and wounds that need to be healed. And truth be told I am getting really tired of hanging on. I want to let go but I am frozen/stuck in life. I am trying to find the meaning and reasoning behind all this but my vision has become clouded and blurred. I feel as if I am standing here while the entire world around me continues to move. I am stinking in the sand with no escape that I can see in my future. “How many times have you heard me cry out “God please take this”? How many times have you given me strength to just keep breathing? Oh, I need you. God, I need you now.” This has been my hearts cry for months now. Somehow, some way I keep moving and breathing. I found myself in a place that I never thought I would. I never imagined that I would end up in this place, standing on this road. Just trying to figure out how I detoured to this place of guilt, shame, and secrets. All I know is if I keep crying out, maybe, just maybe someone will hear me and stop to help. So there on that road of mud I sit waiting to be rescued by my Prince. I know he has been by to help me so many times, but I never accepted. Pride held me back. But today, March 5, 2013, I am ready and wanting to be rescued. I am ready to lay down my pride and my desires and passions so both hands are free to reach up and hold tight to my prince, my rescuer, my savor. What has changed you might be wondering? To be honest, I have no idea. All I know is I want to move forward in life and leave the past behind me and walk into the bright future that is waiting for me. No more looking into the past and dwelling on it. It is time to move forward, to see the mistakes and learn from them and continuing moving forward.
Psalms 65:1-5
What mighty praise, O God, belongs to you in Zion. We will fulfill our vows to you, for you answer our prayers. All of us must come to you. Though we are overwhelmed by our sins you forgive them all. What joy for those you choose to bring near, those who live in your holy courts. What festivities await us inside your Holy Temple. You faithfully answer our prayers with awesome deeds, O God our savior, You are the hope of everyone of earth, even those who sail on distant seas.
What mighty praise, O God, belongs to you in Zion. We will fulfill our vows to you, for you answer our prayers. All of us must come to you. Though we are overwhelmed by our sins you forgive them all. What joy for those you choose to bring near, those who live in your holy courts. What festivities await us inside your Holy Temple. You faithfully answer our prayers with awesome deeds, O God our savior, You are the hope of everyone of earth, even those who sail on distant seas.
Amazing how surprised I am that each day the Bible speaks right into my heart of what I am dealing with. LIVING BIBLE. It is alive and it still speaks to us today.
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