Wow its been awhile. I decided to update this tonight. Couldnt really get to sleep, so i decided that this was the next best thing to do. As i am typing this, some many things are going/racing through my head. I have been realizing just how crazy life can get and sometimes its to crazy for my liking. But i just try and keep my head up and keep on trucking through life and try and make it to that next rest stop where i can finally find rest in HIM.
God has blessed me with wonderful relationships. I adore each one of them and each one has a different meaning to me. I cant thank God enough for my mentor that He has brought in my life. Bobbie Jo Dinkel. The most amazing woman that i have ever meet. She has counciled me through so many different things in just the short time that i have known her. And i love her very much. I have also meet one of my best friends since moving out here. He has been there no matter how crazy i get or my life gets, which is new and amazing for me. For anyone who is struggling in life, find that one or two people that can make you smile no matter the situation and who will come a minutes notice. Once you have found these people, dont loose them and cherish every moment that you have with them. I truly dont know what i would do without them. My life wouldnt be the same that i know for sure.
However, one thing that i have come to know is that life is not without heartaches. Some of them are more significant than others. But each on effects us. Many times we think that we can get through life by just patching our hearts up and we think that that small piece of duck tape will work. I have yet to find that true. If you have, please let me know how you do it cause i would love to know to accomplish this. Back to heartaches. Why do we have to have them has been on of my biggest questions lately and what in the world am i suppose to take out of them. Over this past summer, many things have changed for. Friendships, family relationships, my relationship with God. However, not all of them have been bad. Some have been though. Many of these relationships have come to a halt. Friends and family. My walk with God has grown tremendously because of the halts. He has been the one that has been there the entire time. Through this time i have come to the conclusion that i am done with games. I am NOT playing the game of competition for a friendship. I am NOT making a person i care for choose me or someone else. I CANT do that and I WONT do that. I would rather loose a friendship than make a person choose. Which has made somethings come to a halt for me, but i know somewhere in this dark shadow there is a rainbow and things will get better. But that doesnt mean i dont have a broken heart. By doing this my heart breaks everytime, but knowing that my friend is happy and satisfied brings me the joy/rainbow for my life.
I want to thank all of my friends that i have in my life. You guys have made me who i am. Please dont every change for anything cause you are exactly who i love and you are exactly who God made you to be. I pray that God blesses each one of you in a mighty way and protects you from heartaches.
If you are reading this and struggling with something in your life and want/need someone to listen, please share your story. I want to know. I want to be that RAINBOW in your life. Know that there is someone who does care about you and loves you. And if you want to i would love to introduce you to one of my best friends. He is an amazing person and will love you now matter what. His name is Father, Jesus, The Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. He is my Savior and Lord, my Comforter and most of all my FRIEND. And he wants you too!!!!!!!!
